I found myself unable to stop looking at porn for long periods of time. My lust became harder to satisfy, and I looked for something different, frequently searching for porn featuring same-sex actors, nonconsensual sex or occasionally even pedophilia. At its worst, I would look at porn every day. (quoted from Closing the Window, by Tim Chester)
A 1997 study of compulsive sexual behavior (CSB) suggested that the extent of CSB was both under-recognized and underappreciated. Previous estimates cited in that study indicated that 5 or 6% of adults were affected by CSB. That, however, is likely an underestimate at this time, given the easy access to porn on the web, and its resultant anonymity. The sexual behaviors engaged by the study’s subjects did not even mention online porn, which was just beginning to emerge as a problem.
This early study’s research data were responses to “The Compulsive Sexual Disorders Interview.” Fifty-four percent of the 36 individuals reported a history of childhood physical or sexual abuse. Seventy-five percent reported that their sexual behavior sometimes occurred when under the influence of alcohol or drugs. The researchers suggested that the lack of a universally accepted definition of CSB was a major stumbling block to future work. They also said more work needed to be done to establish the frequency of CSB and clarify if it was indeed an addiction.
A 2006 article reviewed CSB (called impulsive-compulsive sexual behavior, ICSB) and assessed the merit of classifying it as an addiction. It concluded that there was still only limited evidence to classify ICSB along with the chemical addictions. “It is hoped, that as more research is done on this disorder, it will become clearer if this disorder should be classified in that manner or in some other manner.” Recent studies with neuroimaging technology seem to be providing evidence that CSB is a form of addiction.
A July 2014 article published in the PLOS One journal noted that while the DSM-5 classified pathological gambling as a behavioral addiction, video-gaming, internet use and sex (Hypersexual Disorder) were not included in the main part of the DSM. CSB was described in a University of Cambridge report on this research as an obsession with sexual thoughts, feelings or behavior that they are unable to control; which negatively influence personal or work life. CSB sufferers also have high levels of distress from feelings of shame. The study compared 19 heterosexual males with CSB to 19 age-matched heterosexual males without CSB. All CSB subjects met the proposed criteria for Hypersexual Disorder.
The participants were shown a series of short videos featuring either sexually explicit content or sports while their brain activity was monitored by functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI). The research found that three regions in the brain were more active in the brains of individuals with CSB than the control group. “Significantly, these regions – the ventral striatum, dorsal anterior cingulate and amygdala – were regions that are also particularly activated in drug addicts when shown drug stimuli.”
The researchers also asked participants to rate the level of sexual desire they felt while watching the videos. “As anticipated, patients with compulsive sexual behaviour showed higher levels of desire towards the sexually explicit videos.” A correlation was also found between brain activity and age. The younger the person was, the greater the level of activity in the ventral striatum in response to pornography. This association was strongest in subjects with CSB.
The study’s lead author said that while there are clear differences in brain activity that mirror those with drug addicts, these differences cannot be used to diagnose CSB; nor can they suggest that porn is inherently addictive. Dr John Williams, Head of Neuroscience and Mental Health at the Wellcome Trust, said:
This study takes us a step further to finding out why we carry on repeating behaviours that we know are potentially damaging to us. Whether we are tackling sex addiction, substance abuse or eating disorders, knowing how best, and when, to intervene in order to break the cycle is an important goal of this research.
A study published in the July 2014 edition of JAMA Psychiatry found a significant negative association between the hours of porn viewed per week and the grey matter volume in the parts of the brain related to porn consumption. The researchers speculated that this loss of brain function “could reflect change in neuroplasticity as a consequence of an intense stimulation of the reward system [one of the areas of the brain associated with addiction].” It also could be a precondition that makes porn consumption more attractive. The authors said:
Since pornography appeared on the Internet, the accessibility, affordability, and anonymity of consuming visual sexual stimuli have increased and attracted millions of users. . . . Based on the assumption that pornography consumption bears resemblance with reward-seeking behavior, novelty-seeking behavior, and addictive behavior, we hypothesized alterations of the frontostriatal network in frequent users.
What would you say if someone came up to you after a church service and said:
“Dirty, ugly, shameful, unwanted and unloved are a few of the words I’ve used to describe myself. For twenty years I have lived in the darkness of sexual addiction.”
or
“I was a good, Christian boy raised in a good Christian home and community, and my life didn’t look any different from the world and what it promotes sexually. . . . I knew all the Christian doctrines, but in my heart I was helpless to resist, a slave to my desires—for the next 25 years.”
or
“After college I “stumbled” across pornography following a broken relationship. . . . After every fall I would be crushed with guilt and shame; I would ask for forgiveness; I would feel better; and then shortly thereafter fall again.”
Could you give these three people any hope and practical help for their struggles with sexual sin? One place you could suggest is Harvest USA. In their Winter 2013 Newsletter, you can read the complete personal stories of the three people quoted above. In that same newsletter, is the Dave White and Nicolas Black article, mentioned in a previous blog post, “Our Porn-is–the-Norm Culture.”
Another helpful resource that I’ve used regularly in Tim Chester’s book, Closing the Window. Chester said that porn is providing the sex education for a generation of young people. It is establishing their expectations for sex and marriage. “We have a generation of young people for whom the call to repentance must include a call to turn from porn.”
Chester gave a helpful, biblically sound definition. Porn “is anything we use for sexual titillation, gratification or escape—whether it was intended for that purpose or not.” So looking at ads or catalogues to stimulate lust, “undressing” someone with your eyes, fantasizing about sex with someone who is not your spouse, are equally pornographic along with sexually explicit material in magazines or movies or on the Internet.
The biblical starting point for this definition of pornography is Matthew 5:27-28, “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Chester suggested five key ingredients that need to be in place to win the battle with porn:
Abhorrence of porn—a hatred of porn itself (not just the shame it brings) and a longing for change.
Adoration of God—a desire for God, arising from a confidence that he offers more than porn.
Assurance of grace—an assurance that you are loved by God and right with God through faith in the work of Jesus.
Avoidance of temptation—a commitment to do all in your power to avoid temptation, starting with controls on your computer.
Accountability to others—a community of Christians who are holding you accountable and supporting you in your struggle.
John Freeman, the President of Harvest USA, had this to say about Closing the Window: “This is a wonderful resource to add to the arsenal of anyone serious about finding freedom from the power of pornography. . . . It is an excellent pastoral tool to help those dealing with and impacted by the false promises and lies of our porn-is-the-norm culture.”
Several years ago I had a conversation with Tim Geiger, now the Executive Director of Harvest USA, about counseling individuals struggling with sexual sin. I frankly told him of my reluctance to counsel individuals with this issue. The problems were so entrenched. The denial and resistance was so strong. This was coming from someone who has spent most of his counseling career working with addicts and alcoholics. But that reluctance faded away after I read Closing the Window. This is THE resource to read and recommend to individuals struggling with porn.
